Quoticisms | Titanic


99 years ago over 1500 people lost their lives when the Titanic sank.

It just took one moment--one second of inattention, negligence or whatever happened that night--and the lives of thousands were forever-changed, leaving a sad & tragic mark on the pages of history.

Odd that we can know that and still think that the little things we do or don't do can never really affect our own lives or the lives of others.

-Ashley B. Harris
Ashley Wife & Mom

Ashley is a thirty-something wife and mother of two boys. She enjoys spending time with her family, as well as reading and decorating their home. Her blogging adventures began in 2006 as a single mother and have carried on through marriage and a new life with a husband, a ten-year-old, and an infant.

Making Choices


I love reading.

And music.

But I really love reading.

Which I've been doing a lot of lately, thanks to the fact that we have a fantastic library here.

So that's why last night, before bed, I was reading one of my latest books I checked out.

Fablehaven: Keys to the Demon Prison (Book Five) by Brandon Mull

Which--so far--is a fantastic book.  Just like the previous four.

It's a juvenile fiction book about a brother and sister who go to visit their grandparents for a few weeks and discover they live on a magical preserve where fairy tales and fantasy creatures really exist.

So, back to last night.  I was reading  on this book and came across a paragraph that I had to save because it's just one of those things that struck me because it's so wholly true and applicable in every part of our life.
"Making mistakes is part of learning to choose well.  No way around it.  Choices are thrust upon us, and we don't always get things right.  Even postponing or avoiding a decision can become a choice that carries heavy consequences.  Mistakes can be painful--sometimes they cause irrevocable harm--but welcome to Earth.  Poor choices are part of growing up, and part of life.  You will make bad choices, and you will be affected by the poor choices of others.  We must rise above such things."
This is one of those "wow" things to me.

In this part of the book, the young boy is grieving because he made a decision that he thought was good.  He showed mercy on one of the creatures on the preserve that he'd grown to trust and that creature took his act of kindness and used it to betray the boy and destroy and endanger everyone that he loves...possibly the world.

In the final moments of a friend, whose life is taken as a result of the above action, that friend shared those words with the boy.

"You will make bad choices, and you will be affected by the poor choices of others.  We must rise above such things."

Ashley Wife & Mom

Ashley is a thirty-something wife and mother of two boys. She enjoys spending time with her family, as well as reading and decorating their home. Her blogging adventures began in 2006 as a single mother and have carried on through marriage and a new life with a husband, a ten-year-old, and an infant.

Tyisms | New Fish


Ty just told me he's so proud he got new fish that tears are about to fall out of his eyes.
Ashley Wife & Mom

Ashley is a thirty-something wife and mother of two boys. She enjoys spending time with her family, as well as reading and decorating their home. Her blogging adventures began in 2006 as a single mother and have carried on through marriage and a new life with a husband, a ten-year-old, and an infant.

Tyisms | New Dad


Ty and Jason were out on an adventure tonight and Ty told Jason not to fall down in the sewer and die because it would take his Mama "several days" to find him a new Dad.  Jason and I both aren't quite sure how to feel about this!
Ashley Wife & Mom

Ashley is a thirty-something wife and mother of two boys. She enjoys spending time with her family, as well as reading and decorating their home. Her blogging adventures began in 2006 as a single mother and have carried on through marriage and a new life with a husband, a ten-year-old, and an infant.

How Times Change


We got a new comptuer recently and the shift of files has me sorting through old documents that I have but have forgotten about.

Once such document was the following (possibly still unpublished) blog from 2008 which has me laughing at how quickly time and circumstance can completely change a person.

Enjoy!  I know I did!



I read an article on Yahoo earlier that’s bounced around in my noggin all day waiting at the depot to get on the right train of thought.

Wouldn’t you know that train left the station when I was in the shower and unable to get my fingers on a keyboard.

The article was on men and why so many of them choose to be lifelong bachelors instead of getting married and settling down.

The reason: They feared a bad marriage more than they feared being alone.

And this is where I get my feathers all in a ruffle because I have this certain relationship with the male species and it just drives me nuts.

Have you ever known two people that have SO much in common and yet they just can’t get along for the love of all things Pure and Holy? That’s me and men. The older I get the more I find that I have in common with that gender.

Conflict resolution, for instance. I have two methods of conflict resolution. The “pretend it never happened” approach or the “ignore it and it’ll go away” tactic. Very rarely will you ever know me to want to talk something to its death like almost 100% of women typically want to do. I just don’t have it in me. Growing up I was on the other end of those conversations quite frequently which is why I’ve gradually steered clear of many female friendships. Girls want to hash it all out, get it all out in the open, cry it to death, and then giggle and fuss over how silly the whole thing was.

Do you know how draining that is?

Someone tells me “We need to talk” and I just want to skip right to the tears, I’d run away if I could, but those words have this way of instantly zapping all energy from my body. (Note to self: possible strategy in warfare…..)

You lot really are quite high maintenance. And I know this is a case of the whole pot and kettle thing, but seriously….

Anyway. Moving back to my original train of thought.

It seems to be a new concept these days that some people might exist that don’t particularly want to get married or don’t hang their hopes and dreams on the notion of achieving wedded bliss. And heaven forbid that person might be a female! I mean, sure a man might not want to give up his bachelorhood for the sake of one woman to nag him for all the days of his life (I’m sure it’s a completely misguided notion on his part, too)……but a woman that doesn’t hand over life and limb for the sake of entering into matrimony borders on sacrilege to the people of the world.

All drama aside, let me raise my hand and say that I’m scandalously one of those women. I haven’t always been that way, and I may not always be that way. But here and now, I have more important things to worry about than “landing a man”.

Sure, I like a sappy chick flick just as much as any girl. It’s nice to read a lovey-dovey romance novel every now and again. But when I lay my head on my pillow at night and get down to what’s really important to me…..a man and marriage just don’t enter into that picture.

My son’s at the first and foremost. How could I want, much less ask for, more when I’ve been given so much just in that little boy. Sure, I have good days and bad days with him, but at the end of every day I just can’t see loving a man as much as I love this little piece of my heart and soul. Perhaps that’s why first comes love, second comes marriage, THEN comes the baby in the baby carriage; because my heart is so full of love for my snuggly little boy that it needs little other to be complete, and those things that it does need—God, family, friends……well, it’s more than full with those, too

I have it all.

How could I want more? How could a man complete me any more than I already am

This notion that we need someone else to complete us; that we need someone else to really live a life worth living….it’s just a little bit offending to me. It’s not that I’m afraid of getting hurt again, it’s not that I just don’t want to try, and it’s certainly not that I don’t think I could find someone to make me happy….it’s just that I love who I am and I love where I am in my life and I just don’t think there’s much improving on it.

I have all I could ever want.

Anything else would be too much.




Did you make it through that with a straight face?

Cause I didn't. 

Who is that person?!

I think this is definitely one of those instances where you sit back, look at your former self and realize that you truly don't know what you're missing until you wake up one morning and realize what you have.
Ashley Wife & Mom

Ashley is a thirty-something wife and mother of two boys. She enjoys spending time with her family, as well as reading and decorating their home. Her blogging adventures began in 2006 as a single mother and have carried on through marriage and a new life with a husband, a ten-year-old, and an infant.

"I'm Sorry" doesn't seem to be the hardest words


Bear with me. This one's been festering under the surface for a few months.

And it began to come to a head a few weeks ago from separate unrelated incidences.

And if you know me, you know I can't resist it once it comes to a head. I must pick at it and, eventually, pop it.

Because that's how I get rid of irritations. I get the junk out there and let nature run its cleansing course. Especially if it's not one single little imperfection. When it's a whole breakout it's really hard to resist.

What's got me speaking in blemishes?

Apologies.

And how they're misused and abused.

“I'm sorry”, to me, should be reserved for when you accidentally did something that you had no intentions of doing and you truly, honestly, and sincerely regret it. In Insurance terms: "Sudden and accidental."

Then you say “I'm sorry” with your mouth, and you mean it with your heart and actions.

That's what “I'm sorry” is for.

“I'm sorry” is not for those instances in which you say or do something you know you shouldn't say or do, but you say or do it anyway just cause you feel like it or you think you're entitled to (which you're not, but that's an altogether separate blog)

Because that's a conscious decision in which you decide that it's worth it to you, regardless of the eventual cost or unpleasantness.

“I'm sorry” does not apply in that instance.

Which translates to: No one has the right to say or do something to intentionally hurt someone else and expect that they can just make it better with an apology.
But on that train of thought, let's pretend for a moment that life really does work that way.

That I really can do whatever I want to do without fear of the consequences as long as I say two little magic words.

So if I'm having a bad day and someone cuts me off in traffic and it's that last straw that makes me mad enough...I can follow them home and exact whatever revenge I want to on them (sorry, Jeff Lindsay is the latest author I've been reading), and if they're seriously injured or worse then it's okay, because I can just say “I'm sorry” and everything is instantly better! No need to actually feel bad or be remorseful for what I did. Sure it affected someone else and hurt someone else and may have permanently affected someone else. (Need I re-blog about how words have as powerful of an effect on others as a physical blow?)

But if I say “I'm sorry” there's no sense in it affecting me--the individual who made the decision in question.

Because “I'm sorry” isn't as difficult to say as it should be.
Ashley Wife & Mom

Ashley is a thirty-something wife and mother of two boys. She enjoys spending time with her family, as well as reading and decorating their home. Her blogging adventures began in 2006 as a single mother and have carried on through marriage and a new life with a husband, a ten-year-old, and an infant.